Masculine/Feminine Polarity + Sex
Sex is not separate from the rest of your life.
It’s a mirror—a precise, unflinching reflection of what’s happening beneath the surface.
When something is out of balance within you, or between you and your partner, it often shows up here first. Not because sex is the problem, but because it reveals the truth. The truth of how safe you feel. How much you trust. How open you are to being seen. How deeply you’ve allowed yourself to feel. And how much you’re still protecting, performing, or holding back.
In this work, we don’t begin by fixing sex. We begin by listening to what it’s trying to show us.
We slow down. We return to the body. We pay attention to the energy beneath the words—where the polarity has collapsed, where resentment lives, where shame hides, where softness has been replaced by self-protection.
We explore masculine and feminine polarity not as roles or rules, but as living, relational energies—each with their own intelligence, their own rhythm, their own medicine.
There is no script here. Only the invitation to bring your full self into the space—honest, embodied, and awake.
And when presence returns, so does aliveness. When safety returns, so does desire. And when truth is restored, intimacy becomes sacred again.
What follows are reflections from those who’ve walked this path.
“I had no idea when I started this journey with you that I would even be addressing anything sexual. It was just another thing for me that I felt was broken about me, but I did not see it as something in my life that needed to be addressed first, because there were so many other things that I felt needed fixing.
When I started broaching this subject with you, I was uncomfortable and frankly terrified to even look at my feelings about it, let alone discuss any feelings that I had that were at all sexual in nature. I went back and forth between denying that entire part of my self, and being angry that I had lost it along the way.
You assured me that it was not only ok for us to discuss these issues, but the sexual field was actually a revealing window inward, and the way I felt about and approached my sexuality was a mirror of the way I felt about my self. I didn’t believe you fully when you first said this, but you are so SO right.
Over the past few months I have really been delving into and exploring my feelings in this sexual field, and opening up to my femininity - which is a sentence I can’t believe I am even writing. Femininity is not only something I was absolutely never ever in touch with in myself before, but something I used to see as a horribly embarrassing weakness in others.
I operated almost entirely from my masculine, and I was proud of that. I could do anything myself, I didn’t need anyone. And now that I’ve made a conscious decision to take a step down from my need to prove myself, and a step back in my relationship, and let my husband take a step forward, I see how valuable it has been to let him lead me and take care of me. And that in itself is tremendously powerful for both of us.
I am bursting with love for my new self. And my sex life is now like nothing I even knew was possible. I spent many years and decades not being aware of feeling bodily needs or urges or feelings, and even more than that, I think I was actually taking pride in actively denying them. As if admitting to sexual needs would have made me a lesser person.
Now I fully embrace all these feelings, and I am in beautiful concert with my husband in a very plentiful and extremely exciting sexual life every day.”
“[Saadya] has a deep understanding of what most couples don’t even know they’re struggling with - particularly male/female dynamics, codependency, and what it is that kills the polarity in a relationship. ”
“The sex we’ve had [since the retreat] was absolutely amazing, and there was a degree of honesty and freedom that was never there. I’m so grateful that you brought [sex] up because it’s one of the things that I hadn’t thought of improving, but it’s definitely improved.”